“If the numbers we see in domestic violence were applied to terrorism or gang violence, the entire country would be up in arms, and it would be the lead story on the news every night.”  –  Rep. Mark Green

In Part 1 of this two-part series I presented an overview of the nationwide travesty known as domestic violence and abuse.  To briefly review: domestic violence, also known as spousal abuse, domestic abuse, or battering is defined as a pattern of abusive behaviors by one partner against another who are involved in some style of intimate relationship whether it be marriage, family, cohabitation or dating.

Domestic violence and abuse is not limited to the obvious physical violence, but rather comes in many forms including: physical assault or aggression; sexual abuse; emotional abuse; verbal abuse; and, economic abuse.  Domestic violence and abuse does not discriminate.  It can happen to anyone regardless of age, gender, size, race, ethnic background, economic level, or sexual preference.  The goal of the perpetrator of domestic violence is control.  They will attempt to wrestle away control from their victim and tightly hold on to it using guilt, shame, intimidation, humiliation, isolation and fear.

Although there is no way to know the exact numbers of domestic violence and abuse, there is a large body of evidence clearly indicating that women are far more likely than men to be the victim of such violence and abuse.  Women are also more likely to be injured by an abusive partner.  Even more challenging than determining the rate of violence against women is determining the level of violence against men.  Male victims of domestic violence and abuse are often even more reluctant than their female counterparts to come forward.

A U.S. Department of Justice report in which 16,000 Americans were surveyed demonstrated that just over 22% of women and over 7% of men reported a history of domestic violence sometime in their life whether it be from a current or former spouse, cohabitating partner, boyfriend or girlfriend, or while on a date.  Another U.S. study showed that women were thirteen times more likely to seek out medical attention than men as a result of injuries due to spousal violence.

When it comes to domestic violence and abuse the “other” victim of such behaviors are the children.  Over three million children witness domestic violence each and every year in the U.S. alone.  Over the past few decades we have become more and more aware of the developmental, emotional, and psychological impact of exposure to domestic violence on children.  Such exposure has been shown to further impact their behavioral, social and cognitive development as well.  Some of the more common impacts on children include escalating aggressiveness, depression, and anxiety.  Just as troubling is the perpetuation of the “cycle of violence” seen as a correlate between the exposure of children to domestic violence and neglect and violence in adulthood.   Furthermore, it has been shown that children who witness violence against their mother are much more likely to demonstrate signs and symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
 Although it should go without saying…domestic violence should not happen to anyone, ever!  Yet, sadly, it does, and at an alarming rate.  No one should live in fear of their partner.  If you find yourself in immediate danger CALL 911.  If you, or someone you know, are being victimized by domestic violence and abuse please contact one of our exceptional local agencies committed to helping victims of this all too rampant problem.

Domestic Violence Solutions for Santa Barbara County is an extraordinary program providing shelter, safety and support via a broad range of services to victims and families of domestic violence and abuse.  They can be contacted at their main administrative office in Santa Barbara by calling (805) 963-4458.  Just some of the many programs and services they provide include:
Emergency Shelter:  There are three confidential emergency shelters available to women and their children throughout Santa Barbara County where they can stay for up to 45 days.  These shelters not only provide safety, but residents also receive emotional support, clothing, food, counseling and support groups, as well as other services.
24-Hour Crisis Hotline:  Four separate hotlines are manned around the clock by trained staff providing information, counseling, and referrals, and are able to facilitate admission to one of their emergency shelters.  These can be accessed by calling the following hotlines:
v  Santa Barbara Shelter
964-5245

v  Lompoc Shelter
736-0965

v  Santa Maria Shelter
925-2160

v  Santa Ynez Valley
686-4390
Transitional Housing Programs:  A transitional housing program for residents who have been in emergency shelter and have met their goals during their respite is available.  Women and their children are able to stay for up to eighteen months in one of the apartments maintained by Domestic Violence Solutions while continuing to receive counseling and support services.
Anger Management Counseling:  This program provides counseling to both court mandated and voluntary individuals who battle with problems controlling their anger.  Domestic Violence Solutions runs a 3-6 month program working to teach appropriate responses to anger.
The Legal Aid Foundation of Santa Barbara County provides legal assistance free of charge to low-income individuals, and will assist any and all people victimized by domestic violence regardless of income.  They will assist in obtaining Restraining Orders in order to protect victims from their abusers, and further help in obtaining appropriate child custody and visitation orders.  They can be reached at their offices located in Santa Barbara, Santa Maria and Lompoc.
Santa Barbara

301 E. Canon Perdido Street

Santa Barbara, CA  93101

805-963-6754

Santa Maria

301 S. Miller Street, Suite 121

Santa Maria, CA  93454

805-922-9909

Lompoc

604 E. Ocean Avenue, Suite B

Lompoc, CA  93436

805-736-6582

Remember, abusers are incredibly talented at controlling and manipulating their victims.  These victims are exhausted, scared, confused and ashamed.  They need help out of their nightmare of a situation, but are often incapable of doing so.  Although it is impossible to know with certainty what goes on behind closed doors there are telltale signs and symptoms of domestic violence and abuse.  If you witness the warning signs of abuse in a friend, family member, or co-worker, take them very seriously and help them get the help they need.